My Name is Rachel Corrie

I haven’t written in a while- mostly because i haven’t known where to start. Being involved in this project has given me so much…and it’s made me question so much. It could be that because i have just finished 5 years of schooling and am now sitting directly in the existential void of: who am i? and what do i do with my life?

I have been thinking a lot about privilege—what i take for granted and how much my idealism is tied to the glory of youth. Although my political horizons are constantly expanding, i struggle with how much i take in because i am afraid of getting lost in despair. It is hard not to sound like a cliche of a young person struggling to find meaning…but heh, what can you do when you live in a shoe?

Often it can be difficult to imagine the distant war torn realities of others (especially for those of us who have never lived it), but i feel like it is so necessary that we at least try to get a sense. The more i learn, the more i feel that, to an extent, the wars and the destruction of other people’s lives are being fought for the comfort and luxury that we benefit from in the ‘developed’ worlds. I think we are all responsible for what is happening around us and ‘over there.’

I have spent my whole degree thinking about and questioning the role of art and activism- and theatre as a tool for social change. Over the past few weeks, i have listened to the guest speakers and audience members talk at the panel discussions and it has been extremely moving because even though this play may not be necessarily converting people’s minds, it is making people think and feel and generating discussion about the how critical the situation is for Palestinians and asking the question: where are we in all of this?

In some ways the talk backs have felt like a forum for artists and activists to share their stories in relation to Rachel’s and to acknowledge that we are all a part of a similar movement. Friends of mine who have come to see this production have expressed how much it has made them reflect upon what they are doing in their own lives.

I think that is the power of this play- because it is one woman speaking for an hour and a half straight, there is space to filter Rachel’s thoughts and experiences through one’s own, and as a result question where you- as the audience member, sits in the midst of it all.

This being said, maybe just questioning ourselves and feeling the catharsis that this play invokes is not enough…maybe it needs to lead to action. When Cindy and Craig Corrie spoke at the panel discussion after the play, they expressed how many people have contacted them to let them know that Rachel’s words, and her story have inspired them to take action of one kind or another. Perhaps we need to realise what we are capable of, and Rachel is one example of how much change one person can affect.

I have more disjointed thoughts to share but i shall save them for another day…

Last night i watched (on google video) a man named Derrick Jensen discuss the premise of his books ‘Endgame.’

Somewhat related, somewhat not, but worth checking out:

part 1

part 2

Day off today and tomorrow. Montreal is buried in another snowstorm. 30 cm blew in yesterday and last night, leaving behind cars disguised as snowdrifts and human-width tracks along the sidewalks.

Last night a group of us met at the Teesri office for a delicious dinner cooked by Rahul’s mother. There was enough food for at least three times as many. The conversation ranged from Dipti’s challenge for us to recall encounters (with Hell’s Angels, grieving mothers and drunks on the bus), the Reasonable Accommodation hearings (very frightening government action currently going on in Quebec) and the reaction of audiences to our show.

The past week has been quite intense. Though not as charged as the opening week, the past week has seen the show grow more solid - in my biased opinion. There is nothing like repetition, for me, I love repeating the patterns and finding the subtle nuances and intricacies of action, story-telling and communication.

I do feel like I made an error, though. On one night, three women attended the show. They asked me before we started how long the show was. Then throughout the performance I noticed them talking to each other and smiling, one woman sat with one leg crossed over the other, bouncing her foot up and down. In my performer’s brain a range of narratives presented. Of course the first (because we performers are ego-centric, in case you didn’t know) was that they were bored. So I played to them. And then noticed glances shared between them. And that’s when I made my mistake: I got angry and righteous.

You should know that performers get upset when people don’t pay attention to them. I have had many conversations with actors, angry when they feel ignored.

And so I got angry at these women. Because they were distracting me and the other audience members.

I realize now that these women were doing something brave. I imagine they were coming to investigate a story that challenged their beliefs. They were coming to challenge the claims that most critics of the politics of this play have not actually seen it. So they came. Which is brave. And they reacted. Which is human. And I reacted with anger. Which is also human.

But I hope that in the future, should this situation present again, that I can remember in the moment (and subdue my ego long enough) to congratulate the audience for their bravery and learn from them.

I, too, am just beginning to learn how dialogue really works - which is ironic considering this is a monologue show -  and continue to find this process inspiring and incredibly rich.

Adrienne

Here is a response to the CBC Online News Article:

Art,What’sItGoodFor?

… If I had the resources, I’d make “Rachel Corrie - The Documentary” and show it on every street corner in every city of the world. It’s a truly heroic tale of a young idealistic woman who lost her one and only life trying to make the world a better place for others. It doesn’t matter if people object to her for political reasons - and people are more than welcome to state their case against her - politically. They’re alive, afterall, to do it. She’s dead. The problem isn’t that there is pressure to mute the telling of her story, the problem is that people who don’t have to are caving in to the pressure. More at Sooeys.com …

The Denver Post: November 18, 2007

Rachel Corrie’s parents have seen more than 30 performances of the one-woman play based on their daughter’s correspondence, by five different actors. “And I’ve never once gotten through it intact,” her father said. More…